Dude, Really? I’m so Freakin Flattered…

Did you know that two rambunctious kids are better deterrents than a wedding ring?  Go figure.  Anyway, I usually don’t get noticed much when I’m out with my kids (which is most of the time)…which is cool because I’m not on the market. However, the other day, while I was out (sans my kiddies) a young man passed by me and gave me the best compliment ever.  EVER.  He said I was, “Fine as Sh*t.” Can you believe that?  I’m as fine…as poop.  Wow, really? I’m not as pretty as a flower or cute as a kitten?  I’m not as beautiful as a butterfly emerging gracefully from her delicate cocoon? Nope….not me! I’m crap-a-lic-ious!  Yay!  Hopefully, this blog will help some lonely dude out there… who for some odd reason…just can’t get a date.  Listen to me….carefully.  Fellas, if you are trying to make a woman swoon (and possibly score a date with her in the future)…telling her that she is on the same level as…well…doo doo…will not make her happy.  I repeat. It will not make her happy.  Just walk away quickly, so you can keep a smidgen of your pride when she gives you…The Look.  Yep, keep it moving, bro…because you you no longer have a chance…ever.  Just sayin…


2 thoughts on “Dude, Really? I’m so Freakin Flattered…

  1. OMG! I think I met his father at the store the other day. Had an middle-agey man tell me “mmmm….your sh*t don’t stink.” That was all. He said that to me and walked off to the produce section.

    Still trying to figure out if that was a compliment on my looks or my ability to wipe my ass thoroughly.

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